Hard to Get Motivated

I started writing fanfiction four years ago or so, and I completed one story. I was so proud of myself, but had the urge to write a sequel. Finishing said sequel has been very difficult for several reasons.
1) I have all the ideas, and even an outline, but actually writing and focusing on writing? No.
2) I am still getting likes and follows on my first story, which is thrilling, but I am also getting some occasionally on my second story which has only seven chapters published, and so I feel guilty. Guilt has not pushed me into action. An ADHD thing or not? I don’t know.
3) I follow some neurodivergent people on social media who say anyone who still relates in any way to the Harry Potter world anymore must be anti-trans, and that couldn’t be farther from the truth! I am being made to feel guilty here, too, so then I wonder if I should at least pull my unfinished sequel down, but then I feel bad because people still like and follow it. I feel this NEED to complete it. I am providing ownvoice disability representation, and this is a way to do it.

I also want to write my memoir. I dream of this. But. I can’t get myself motivated. I have a story to tell, and I have always known this.

Today, I am exhausted and dehydrated. Our large blown up pool has a hole, and yesterday for a hot Labor Day. I promised Kamran we would see if the pool was in good shape. It is not. Do I try to patch it? Or decide next summer what to do?

Sunday, we went to the aquarium, and it was exhausting although fun, too. Since I was using my chair, I was able to be in the front row at the dolphin show. It was amazing! I received compliments on my wheel colors! But it was exhausting. I am recovering from the last few days.

Substitute teaching was an option for today, but I couldn’t and I knew that would be the case today. I needed to time to recover from the last week.

I am currently listening to Elliot Page’s memoir, Page Boy, read by the author. Last week, I listened to TJ Klune’s Under the Whispering Door. I have laughed and cried with a book so much in a long time. I highly recommend it.